News roundup 72

Unemployment rises by almost 40,000 in just three months. Apparently we need more immigrants.

UK FARMERS ‘TO BE EXTINCT IN 27 YEARS’. This will mean that we will have to rely on foreign countries more and be in danger of being blackmailed.

Back-to-work OAPs: Record number of pensioners cannot afford to stay retired. Aren’t these people supposed to be allowed to take a rest?

GET DIPLOMA ‘FOR DOING A PAPER ROUND’. The diploma won’t be worth the paper it’s printed on.

Armed Forces could not help civilians in flu pandemic. Hiring mercenaries to do the job would be a good idea in that case.

You pay £28m for Euro MPs. They aren’t worth 28 pence.

LibDems sink vote on treaty, denying Britons a say on EU constitution. They are all a bunch of traitors.

Tony Blair "to win Silvio Berlusconi's backing for EU presidency". I hope someone assassinates him before that.

EU powers try to isolate Ireland after treaty defeat. They always try to punish opposition.

Farm B&Bs may be forced to close as EU bureaucrats ban owners' pet dogs from kitchen. That’s just stupid.

Now dustmen won't take your rubbish away if wheelie bin is too heavy to pull with two fingers. They are just being lazy.

Weekly bin collections may be scrapped. They need to be reminded who they work for.

England to squeeze in 10million more immigrants and children within 25 years. We are going to have to look forward to more green areas being concreted over.

Hip-hop hoodies to represent British 'national identity' in Beijing Olympics closing ceremony. Is this what represents Britain now?

£833,000: The real cost to the nation of a drug addict revealed. It’s time to build more drug rehab centres and crack down on the dealers.

'Robocop' prison squad called in as riots flare at immigrant centre. If they refuse to behave shoot them.

Second batch of secret anti-terror files discovered on train to Waterloo. What type of idiots are employed in the security services?

UN 'exaggerated' Ethiopia drought. Just trying to make us feel sorry for them.

Raped for 2 hours after calling 999. Someone should get the sack for that blunder.

Barclays uses US anti-terror laws to close British citizens' accounts. The USA shouldn’t have a say in banking in this country.